How to Find Balance When Making Time to Serve Others
Thus far we examined four barriers that block Christians from serving consistently, family-of-origin influences, confusion about our roles as caregivers, tunnel vision to our own trials, and thinking we are not needed.
Today, we are going to talk about finding balance.
Super Girl Dreams
As a child, I was the little girl with the “S” on her chest convinced she was going to save the world (if only she could first reach the cereal on the top shelf of the pantry).
I joined a service organization in high school and was blessed with a scholarship for my efforts. Throughout college, I studied psychology and worked alongside my parents at a faith-based outreach program. After completing graduate school, I continued to work in various community agencies, including my first job as a therapist in a juvenile detention center.
At work, I fired on all cylinders.
All. The. Time.
I took lunch breaks at my desk, carried a pager for twenty-six weeks out of the year, answered phone calls all hours of the night, and worked holidays and weekends. During the times I wasn’t on call, my kids and the struggles inherent to working in an inpatient facility were never far from my mind. I went years without a vacation.
I served daily on the job, but not so much in the church. In hindsight, I viewed my time after work as my time.
Learning From Hindsight
Looking back, I see now how the burnout I endured was due to my inability to set proper boundaries and work to maintain balance.
Balance is a funny thing. We all want it. We all strive for it.
Balance is not a static concept. In fact, quite the opposite. Ironically, most of us fail to actually notice the times when we are in a state of equilibrium.
Life is running smoothly and we run right along with it. It is only when a curve ball gets thrown our way and upsets our apple cart, that we take notice of the discord to our harmony.
When we struggle with balance, adding service to the mix feels like putting one more thing on our already overfilled plates.
But if we can shift our thinking a bit and come to an understanding that balance is actually a constant, dynamic ongoing process rather than an end-all goal to be achieved, then we can ebb with the flow, lean into the curves, and bend in the wind.
Serving From Rest
Rest is essential to our physical, mental, relational, spiritual, and emotional health.
Unfortunately, our society has adopted a hamster furiously running on the treadmill approach to relaxation. We remain a society stuck in our struggle with chronic fatigue.
We diffuse essential oils to unwind, down pots of strong coffee to help us focus on the day before us, and book massages, spa days, and long weekend getaways to help us destress.
We go on vacations only to return not refreshed but more exhausted than we were before we left. We covet me-time by binging on Netflix and pints of Haagen Daz. We scour the self-help section of our online bookstores in search of the latest holy grail solution to our endless exhaustion.
And yet, we do not seem to experience true respite.
Sacred Rest
Rest is sacred.
It is deeply personal.
And it deserves our respect.
If we do not give ourselves the right kind of rest, we can never truly feel restored. So, how do we determine which type of rest we need?
We start by determining which kind of tired we are.
In her book, Sacred Rest Dr. Dalton-Smith breaks down the concept of rest into seven specific categories or types. (For my review of Dr. Dalton-Smith’s book, click here.)
Restore From The Source
When we are tired we often simply do not know where to begin to allow healing to occur.
Keep it simple. Begin at the beginning.
Draw from the well that never runs dry. Lean on God’s word for guidance. Reestablish a connection with your Creator by referencing the Operator’s Manual for our lives, the Holy Bible.
Choosing to Rest With Attention and Intention
In order to truly experience restoration, we must take ownership of our pursuit of rest. We cannot idly sit by and wait for the opportunity to present itself. We cannot fall prey to excuses of excessive busyness. Full transparency: do any of us really have more than 24 hours in a day available to us anyway?
We must be willing to stand before the mirror or step under the microscope and risk ourselves being laid bare, exposed flaws and all, before others and before God.
We must seek rest, actively with full attention and clear intention.
Honoring God’s Commandments
Honoring God’s commandment to rest helps us in turn honor his commandment to serve.
In this way, we find balance.
Coming Up
Join us for our next blog post in the It’s YOUR Serve series where we seek guidance and direction in order to answer God’s call on our lives to serve.
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Blessings,
Kimberly
IOH Mom
This website is not a professional counseling website and nothing here should be construed as professional counseling advice. Although Kimberly Bennett, LPC is a Licensed Professional Counselor, she is not your counselor, and no counselor-client relationship is established unless she has signed an agreement with you. All information provided through this website is for informational and educational purposes only. This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure statement. Thanks for visiting!
